Its my first day off in like, 5 months. The first day that im ever alone inside the house. Kaya ko pala. Nung nag move out ako sa bahay para makalimot, tinakasan ko lahat ng memories, lahat ng makakapagpaalala sakin sakanya. Ngayon nagrereplay lahat yun sa utak ko ngayon. Its been half a year and im really doing okay but… Laging may but. Napaka unfair na ang one sided ng grief. Napaka unfair na ako lang to. Napaka unfair. Lagi ko nalang iniisip na sa dulo lahat to mag mamake sense. Na sa dulo, mapapa “kaya naman pala” nalang ako, pero minsan… Nakaka-trap rin yung feeling na to. Kahit pala gano ka kasaya at gano na katagal, pag naiisip mo kung pano ka tinarantado nakakapang lumo pa rin.
These people werent on my “original” clique, but for some reason, we found each other. Theyre like family to me and i feel so alive beinv with them. I love you guys. Thanks for keeping me sane.
Time flies. I’ve been single for 7 months already. Its not that im counting down the days but, it just hit me this day. I know that 7 months is still a short period of time compared to others but, its my longest yet. The past months were so good. I’ve experienced and did a lot of things. I learned a lot especially about myself. I got to re-discover myself. I learned to love myself, flaws and all.
I miss having someone to share this with. And im scared that i’ll never find her. I want fun times. I want to live my life like its my last day. But i want someone holding my hand while i do that too.
Hey, where are you? I’ll wait for you. Im just here.
To the person i almost loved
Hey, its been 24 hours since i’ve gotten your text. To be honest i was so close to texting you back and beg you to try again. But i didnt. Because i know you dont deserve me, I know you deserve better. You couldnt have been more right when you said i had too many hangups. I cannot burden you with that. I just want to tell you that you’re not imagining it. We were really on to something special. I felt it. I feel it now.
You always sang Oasis’s Wonderwall to me.. What i failed to tell you is that I should be the one singing that to you. Because you were the one that saved me. You were the one that made me feel almost complete again. But that’s the thing, almost is not enough. I can be selfish and tell you all the words you want to hear but I love you enough to let you have what you deserve. I wish i can make it work. I wish i can call you up right now and tell you how much you mean to me. But i cant do that anymore.
Thank you for the little things that made me love you so much. Thank you for waking up every morning just to run with me even though you live far away. Thank you for laughing at my corniest jokes. Thank you for letting me lose myself in a book when were together. Thank you for never demanding attention from me. Thank you for baking the best damn cookies ever. Thank you for answering my drunken calls and laughing about them in the morning. Thank you for introducing your faith to me. For letting me see your spiritual side. Thank you for never trying to change me. Thank you for making me so happy. For helping me love myself. For always reminding me that I deserve to be loved. Thank you. I can take it from here. Dont worry, i will never let a petty insecurity get the best of me again. Our love was so innocent and perfect and i will always grieve for the “might have been”.
I hope one day you can read this. And know that I didnt reply to your text because I cannot tie you to me when im just starting to re-discover and love myself again. But i promise, if one day, the universe will allow us to meet again, i will never ever let you go.
For the record, I love you too.
PS: You’re my wonderwall.
How you respond to the question “How was your day?”
I want to hug rihanna
you are fucking gorgeous mama you are!
Ang pinaka gusto kong ma achieve dyan e yung pangalawa. Peace of mind. Yung tipong malayang malaya na talaga ko sa lahat ng bagay na hindi ko naman dapat pinoproblema :-)
Reblogging again cause it’s fantastic.
How i wish all advertisments would be like this. Empowering women. Not inflicting twisted ideas and standards that as a woman, your greatest strength is your beauty.